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This article, The Sith Empire, is property of Semyon Timur Alekseyevich Krokov.

Sith Empire
Shit Empire
Sith's logo.
Leader(s) Emperor Palps
Appears in Star Wars-related games
Country Some parts of Earth-2
Active Dead
Motto "Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hatred and hatred... leads to powah'! UNLIMITED... POWAAAHHH'!!!"-Darth Vader and Palps' saying the Shit motto


The Sith Empire (better known as S*it Empire), also known as the Sith Order or just Sith aka Shit, was an ancient order of force-wielders and alien guys who liked to use glowing red sticks as weapons and were devoted to something called "the dark side of the force", in reality it was just an excuse to be edgy and have zero points on the moral compass if you catch my drift. Eh, yup. Driven by their emotions, well hate, anger, greed, lust, edginess, horniness, jealousy, bitterness and a taste for law-breaking attitude, the Sith were obsessed with gaining power, ultimate power on Earth-2 no matter the cost. "I want this power! I want it now! I want it now and I don't care how!" The order reached the highest point of respect under Darth Sidious, known as Emperor Palpatine aka Daddy Palps, as he would eventually rule the second Earth with Darth Vader as his top minion. In 3 years, however, the deaths of Palpatine and Darth Vader would mark the end of the order of Sith and the empire would die out in no time.

Oh, their main rivals were the Jedi Order, a bunch of goody two-shoes who preferred green light sticks.

Info[]

In the beninging, the Siths were almost dead until Darth Plegious taught some magic tricks to Sidious and he would betray him in his sleep and absorb his power. Palpatine would recruit some guy with horns and red facepaint named Darth Maul as his apprentice and they would plot the downfall of yetis of Antarctica and the Jedi order. First Palps would order Maul to attack a bunch of Jedis in the desert, but fail. Palpatine would then disguise himself as a normal guy, not a Shit lord and would become the chancellor of some swampy place named Naboo. When the kid known as Anakin Sykwalker would grow a bit older, Palpatine would manipulate him around like a wooden marionette and convince him that the entire Jedi Order are evil. Anakin would eat all of these lies, he would eventually kill Mace Windu by throwing him outta the Windu at Palps' tower and Palpatine would reverse to his ugly-as self, his face having buttcheeks on his forehead and such. Palpatine would then mould Ann to Darth Vader and the Sith would strike at the Jedi once again, this time erasing all of them except the chosen few. Vader would lose his legs and one arm during a battle inside a volcano with Obi Wan Kenobi and Palpatine would fetch him and make him half mechanical.

A few years later, Vader would lead an all-out assault on the rebel base and capture his own daughter (unknown to him, though) to tell him some intel on the rebels. The Sith would use her as bait to lure the rebels out and kill them, but that plan would fail and Leia would get saved. Next, Vader would find out that the main rebel with blond hair is actually his own son and he would try to convince him to join him, but no. Vader would then once again report his failure to his master.

Lastly, Vader would finally convince Luke to join him in overthrowing the big bad Emperor, but that would backfire when Palpatine wanted to convince Luke to join him in his father's stead. When the Sith lord attacked Luke with his Shit lightning, Vader threw him into a blue hole.

Sith's downfall[]

After Palps' death, Vader ordered Luke to remove his robotic helmet and respirator so he can see him as a yuman again. Luke did as instructed and Vader died. Ann was burned to a crisp on some forested planet surrounded by teddy bears and in the next few years, Han Solof's son would hunt the remaining shits down and the Sith would be erased... forever.

Known members[]

  • Darth Plague - killed by Sheev
  • Emperor Palpatine - Leader, killed by Vader
  • Darth Vader - Defected to the good guys the last min
  • Darth Maul
  • Savage Oppress (Maul with yellow facepaint)
  • Asajj Venteres - a female Sith

Gallery[]