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This article, The Alien Race, is property of Billy cougar. |
| The Alien Race | |
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| Genre(s) | Snuff, reality show, comedy |
| Platform(s) | Almost all, even those old TVs from 80's |
The the three teams are taken to the Kuatan Jungle, where their eighteen-hour challenge awaits. One team ends up in deep trouble due to a teammate's poor judgement, giving them their first loss and giving another team their first win. Meanwhile, one contestant begins to realise someone might not return their friendship, but brushes it off after being rescued. After the host reveals the votes, causing someone's heartbreak, he then reveals that the episode was actually a reward challenge, sparing a contestant from elimination.
Plot[]
The episode opens with Team Bettah-Tan-U and Team Billy Cougar Is Really Really Really Really Cute in economy class, while Team Awesome is enjoying first class yet again. In economy class, Constantinos Brakus is fast asleep until a rat falls into his mouth, shocking him enough to wake him up. Fat Boner is shown having a nightmare about the racket crashing, and after over-reacting to Tony Montana's plea to calm down, he accidentally punches him in the eye. This gives Montana a black eye and it annoys him, but he dismisses this by saying: "Nothing a little ice and revenge won't fix". Boner appears relieved, but does a double take when he hears the word "revenge". However, Tony insists that he misheard him and inquires Fat about any life-threatening allergies.
Boner then suspects in the confessional that Montana may not like him and seems a bit fearful by this. Also in economy class, Kia is shown comforting Bo Jackson about his curse. In first class, Angie Ng is shown pretending to use a computer with a pizza box and drawing of her and Earnest Johnson on it while using a real dead mouse as a computer mouse. Kinzie Kensington worriedly asks what she is up to, and Ng tells her that she is updating her blog. She asks Angie if she would like to check her E-mail when she finishes and Ng accepts, but then notices the pizza box and actual dead mouse, which causes her to awkwardly refuse after seeing Angie eat a slice of pizza from her "laptop". Tanya, who is still missing a tooth from when Shaundi attacked her in the previous episode, tries covering up her bruises with makeup. Twilight Sparkle sarcastically tells Tanya that she looks really good, while Tanya scoffs and shuts the mirror she was using. The White Rabbit then announces that their next destination is the Kuatan Jungle on Outworld again.
The three teams exit the plane as Bugs welcomes them to Outworld. He explains that the challenge is to hike along an ancient Shokan trail that goes all the way to Kilik. In the ruins, one team must find the golden treasure. The first team to find the treasure will fly first-class to their next location while the losers will send someone home. Vince begins to list the dangerous animals in the Jungle and Johnson raises his hand. Rabbit, already knowing the question of Johnson's many allergies in said jungle, pulls out an EpiPen. Earnest makes a grab for it, however, Sebbane tells him that it wouldn't make sense to give it to the person with the allergies in case he passed out. Angie pleads to be given the responsibility, but after Earnest begs Kinzie to with puppy eyes, Kinzie holds it instead of Angie. Devastated, Angie begins to list Earnest's deadly allergies to the bugs, but Vince ignores her tirade and gives it to Kinzie, making Earnest happy. Johnson asks Kinzie if she knows how it works, and she tells him that she doesn't have a clue. Earnest explains that if he goes into anaphylactic shock, Kensington has to inject the EpiPen into Earnest's 'naked ass', to which he leers at Kinzie. A disgusted Kinzie gives Johnson the EpiPen. The Bunny then warns the teams of the Shokans, a four-armed specie which holds a deep hatred to humans. Boner asks how far the trip is and to the folks' dismay, it is an eighteen-hour trip. Vincent then gives each team walkie-talkies, in case of an emergency.
The hiking trip begins, and Team Bettah-Tan-U chooses the left path. Ted Thompson makes his team also choose the left path in order to stay with Kia. Kinzie suggests that her team choose the right path, but Angie thinks that they should choose the left path, as if they chose that path and were wrong, they would still be with the other teams. Johnson agrees with Ng, who becomes ecstatic in the confessional, stating that she heard wedding bells in her head after Earnest agreed with her in front of the whole team. Tanya taunts Kinzie and tells her to decide, as she had jinxed the team with her talk about good luck earlier. Team Awesome ends up taking the path on the right. Team Bettah-Tan-U reaches the zip-line first and they earn the privilege of using the T-Bar. Bo zip-lines down, while Kia rides on his shoulders. Meanwhile, Team Awesome hikes down the right path after separating from everyone else. Earnest thanks Kensington for taking his EpiPen, but she again confesses that she has no idea how to use it. Earnest leers at her and explains that if he gets bitten, then she has to jam it into his ass. Kinzie, disgusted once again, tosses the EpiPen back to him. Suddenly, Earnest is grabbed by an enormous mosquito, but Angie knocks it down with a stone. She catches him as he falls and assures him of her devotion towards his safety. Team Billy Cougar Is Really Really Really Really Cute reaches the zip-line, and Thompson asks where the T-Bar is. Montana zip-lines down using his belt and Boner rides using his hands. He sinks into the water as the zip-line hits a low point, and gets bitten by piranhas.
While walking through the forest, Team Awesome is stopped in their tracks as they notice two Shokans sitting around a fire. Johnson stops the girls and tells him that he has it covered, although a Shokan appears directly beside him, which frightens him. They are held at spear point, and Kinzie desperately calls Sebbane for help. However, there are no batteries in the walkie-talkie since Jax took them to play video games like Pac-Man. Meanwhile, Montana's team still needs Ted, Brakus and Tourettes Guy to cross the zip-line to the bottom. Ted removes his pants and uses it as a makeshift T-Bar. It works for a short while, but his pants catch on fire, and he falls into the water. Guy decides to go next, and puts Brakus in his backpack before sliding across the zip-line, knocking over Thompson and Boner as she reaches the shore.
The Shokans have tied up Team Awesome to a tree, and Johnson suggests that the batteries in the flashlight in his back right pocket could be used inside the walkie-talkie. However, he cannot reach it. Angie excitedly tells him that she can get it, but Tanya rejects the idea and tells Kinzie to, since she's the closest. Kinzie tells Johnson that he is not allowed to enjoy the moment, fully aware of his attraction to her. Kensington removes many items out of Earnest's pockets, and finds some X-Ray glasses. Tanya mockingly asks her what colour Johnson's underwear is, and Kinzie checks. However, Johnson doesn't have any underwear on, and she ends up seeing a lot more. Angie asks if she can borrow the glasses, while Kinzie is aghast, wailing in the confessional later that everyone should suppose to wear underwear. Earnest makes a confessional next, reminiscing about how Kinzie basically touched his s, despite him wearing pants. In the rocket's lavatory confessional, Angie vows that when she wins the money, she will buy arm extensions in order to reach Johnson's pocket. Kinzie continues to search Johnson's pocket, but ends up accidentally injecting herself with his EpiPen. Earnest calms her nerves by telling her that she would be fine, and that the injection is basically a large adrenaline rush. Sparkle digs in Johnson's other pocket and finds the flashlight, and Johnson laughs about getting his pockets confused.
Team Billy Cougar Is Really Really Really Really Cute finds a place to set camp, and Boner begins to complain about the lack of food. He asks for nachos, and Brakus begins to list the ingredients necessary to make nachos in a sarcastic tone. Tourettes tells him to slow down, as he is in the process of making a shopping list. Team Bettah-Tan-U runs into Vince, and Jackson begs for food. Bugs awards them a crate full of bananas for being in first place. Suddenly, his walkie-talkie activates, and Kinzie is heard speaking. The Rabbit nonchalantly thinks that she is in trouble, then cuts to a commercial break. As the show returns, Kinzie is heard panicking through the walkie-talkie again. Ted suddenly jumps into the conversation after hearing that Kinzie "had her hand in Johnson's pants", congratulating Earnest. Tanya and Sparkle add on that they are getting held at spear point by the Shokans and that Kinzie accidentally used the EpiPen on herself and is now going crazy. Kia exclaims about Team Bettah-Tan-U being in first place, and then addresses Ted. Sebbane tells Team Awesome to remain calm, but then, the chime for a musical number is heard. Tanya is in disbelief, while Boner asks if Team Billy Cougar Is Really Really Really Really Cute is forced to sing backup. Vincent then commands that the song is all Team Awesome, and that it must end with a solo from Tanya. Team Awesome then sing Monster by Skillet.
Afterwards, the Shokans notice Tanya's white eyes with no pupils. Tanya misconstrues their reaction as an insult, asking Kinzie if Edenians are that hideous. The Shokans then brush over some large leaves to reveal a tiki of an "Edenian goddess" (in actuality just a regular tiki) that resembles Tanya. Earnest worries at the fact that since Tanya is their "alleged goddess", the rest of Team Awesome would be "expendable". With night fallen, Kia wakes up to a pattering sound. She shines her flashlight on Bo, and he notices that he had been slapping monkeys who wanted their bananas, not bugs. He sighs at the fact that his curse has still not worn away. At Team Billy Cougar Is Really Really Really Really Cute's campfire, Boner hears a growling noise. He wonders if it had been the fire, but Brakus reminds him that fires don't growl. Boner jokingly mentions that since Montana made the fire, it could growl due to being a "Slovene fire". Boner blows on the fire, illuminating their campsite and revealing five strange caterpillar-like creatures. Their fire is extinguished by one of the creature's sneezes, and they are ambushed.
Back with Team Awesome, the two Shokans please Tanya as much as they can. Kinzie comments rapidly about her, still undergoing the effects of Johnson's EpiPen shot. Bo has bandaged the monkeys which he had hurt earlier and begins to walk down the trail with Kia. However, he steps on a twig and awakens the monkeys, causing them to attack him, while Kia watches in fright. The next morning, Team Billy Cougar Is Really Really Really Really Cute wakes up, covered in welts from the recent attack. Tony is over insistent to not do headcount, stating he felt that they were behind to take a headcount, however in reality he intentionally leaves Boner behind. Team Bettah-Tan-U reaches Kilik first, and Vince, once again, announces that they are maintaining the first place slot. He worries about Bo's condition, who is scratched and bawling over having hurt another animal. Kia points out that in that situation, the monkeys hurt him, and Bo tries to focus on the challenge. Team Billy Cougar Is Really Really Really Really Cute arrives at Kilik second. But Sebbane does not allow them to begin searching the ruins until their entire team arrives. Montana accuses him of making the rules as he goes along, and Vincent dismisses it as old news. Montana then goes on a search for Boner.
Team Awesome, still in the same place as the previous day, is wide awake except for Kinzie, who is sound asleep due to the aftermath of Earnest's EpiPen. Kinzie's snoring begins to irritate Angie, saying that it's driving her crazy, but Sparkle corrects her, saying it's driving Ng 'crazier'. Twilight then orders Tanya to get the Shokans to untie them, but Tanya defends them, arguing that they might become angry and make a sacrifice. Earnest agrees with Tanya in fear. In another part of the dense jungle, Montana finds Boner trapped in a large skull. Montana asks what happened, but Boner accuses Tone of seeing the whole incident, as he was awake while the others were asleep when the caterpillar took him away.
Montana lies and states Tourettes, Thompson, and Brakus all went ahead without Boner purposefully, and that he is Boner's only true friend. Boner comments that he has never been so scared of a friend before. Tony then releases Boner from the skull, having no concern for Boner falling to the ground, and they head back to Kilik. Montana and Boner run back to their team, and Vincent allows them to begin searching. Almost immediately after, Ted announces that he has found the treasure. Vincent walks over to Boner and Thompson, who are struggling to remove a small pillar from the ground. Bugs tells them that they have the wrong treasure, and when Kia approaches him with a small golden statue, he crowns Team Bettah-Tan-U the winners of the challenge. Boner removes the pillar, and as the sun casts upon its ominous blue tip, the ruins begin to shake violently. Bugs, and the teams begin to evacuate quickly as the place begins to fall apart.
Briggs finds Team Awesome, but is stopped by Tanya who orders him to kneel down before her. Jacks disregards her and then slices the ropes which tied Team Awesome, and reveals that the Shokans were playing along and that they don't give any fawks about Edenians at all. Tanya is disgusted and frustrated by the fact, and Angie taunts her. Jax reminds them that they lost the challenge and must vote someone off. Earnest is suddenly bitten by a red ant, probably one of his life-threatening allergies. Angie goes as far as to try and suck the poison out of his thumb, causing Earnest to almost barf away. Tanya wonders who to blame for all this, then notices Kinzie and addresses her as she wakes up. Kensington asks if they had won the challenge, giving her angry glares from Angie, Sparkle, and Johnson.
In the first-class section, Bo and Kia relax for the first time. Bo helps himself to a cookie, and Kia begins to ask him a question. Bo already knows it, however, and allows her to bring Ted into the first-class section with her. Kia happily thanks Bo and kisses him on the cheek before running off to get him. Meanwhile, Kinzie, Sparkle, and Angie are sitting in the dining hall discussing the elimination. Angie then joins Sparkle and Kinzie in their plot to vote off Tanya, giving that Kinzie stops being nice to Johnson.
At the Barf Bag Ceremony, Montana appears beside Tanya. Less than thrilled to see him, he tells her to cheer up, as her departure will help him in the game. Tanya lets him know that she knows of his plans which eliminated both Shaundi and MacFarlane. Tone admits that even she couldn't resist him if he kissed her, but Tanya quickly shoots down the thought and says that she could have easily crushed him in the competition. Sebbane begins the elimination ceremony, and makes a joke about Earnest's swollen thumb. He then reveals the votes, which show that Kinzie, Twilight, and Angie all vote for Tanya, while she voted for Kensington, and Johnson voted for Angie. Heartbroken, Angie sobs, and in the confessional, she asks why Johnson would vote her, after everything she did for him. Vincent then reveals that the elimination wasn't real and that Tanya wouldn't be taking the Drop of Shame, for now. Everyone gasps at this, while in the confessional, Tanya swears revenge on both her team and Montana. Sebbane then mocks Tanya about the revenge thingy and signs off the show.
In the cockpit of the rocket, Jackson and Kia are shown to be flying the rocket. Bo says it's a great reward and how it's a great way to end his animal curse. However, he flies into a flock of geese, hitting many of them, which greatly upsets him but claims that his hopes of ending the curse still aren't lost.
Trivia[]
- The giant Shokan cross that was suppose to be on the top of Kilik is replaced with a statue of White Rabbit.
- Tanya's statement that she will make her teammates pay and crush Montana for the big dessert foreshadows her outranking all of her teammates and being tied with Montana in the finale.
- This is the third time in the series in which someone attends the elimination ceremony of another team.
- This is the first episode in which Team Awesome officially comes in last place.
- This is the first time in the series that there has been a fake elimination ceremony.
- In the confessional Tanya states she always knew that one day people would worship her.
- The next episode of this one is "Can't Help Falling in Louvre" and the last one was "Slap Slap Revolution".