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This article, Abe Lincoln with a Bazooka 79, is property of KGBSpetsnaz.

Abe Lincoln with a Bazooka 79 (born September 7, 1994) is a Dominican-American critic of Jason1980 and a friend of Jay Jaymore, Constance Dolorean, and Yuri Blurry. He is also from Newark, New Jersey. The greasers and Samuel Walton are fans of him while Carl Degrasse Dawkins, Peter Kowalski, Algernon Papadopoulos, Melvin O'Connor, and Fatty Johnson hate his guts because he doesn’t agree with their master named Jason1980. Just like Jay Jaymore and Yuri Blurry, he’s an avid anti-brony who also hates the PowerPuff Girls, Steven Universe, Star vs. the Forces of Evil, The Loud House, and Gravity Falls. He named himself after the former American President, Abraham Lincoln, who apparently has either the Bazooka instrument, or the man-portable recoilless anti-tank rocket launcher weapon, which is funny since both of these things were invented after Lincoln’s death.

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